Heskey spoils end of season party

Last game of the season and The Arsenal suffer a shock loss away to midland giants Birmingham City. However with all the relegation battles taking place no one really noticed, which is nice. Emile Heskey decided to be a hero for The Brum in this tepid affair but he decided to leave it till the very last minute, not nice. With Saint Wenger admitting the players had half an eye on the FA Cup Final, King Henry, Pires, Reyes and Lauren rested this wasn't going to be a 'sure thing'. Well just to report, DB10 who is still to find out what his future holds equalised in the 88th minute believing The Arsenal had salvaged the game - however the big lummox Emile 'carpet' Heskey decided to give Sven a reminder of his scoring prowess after being left out the England squad.

Saint Wenger believes the loss will help the players focus on the final, "I felt the most important thing was that we had a good run-out with no injuries and the fact we got caught in the end by taking things a little bit too easy will help us to focus on Saturday. Having just won 7-0, the fact we lost will improve our defensive performance because today we got caught out by two easy goals."

Tel and Reyes doubts

Ahead of the FA Cup Final, Thierry Henry and José Reyes are possible doubts for the big match. Saint Wenger in a exclusive gleaned interview had this to say "It's very difficult to assess Thierry. He had a slight reaction on Wednesday night and I will see what the position is on Wednesday or Thursday. Reyes got a kick in training so we have to assess him too". No doubt our shrewd manager is keeping all the cards close to his chest and nearer the time no doubt the better the players will get, which is nice.

FA Cup Final story

Saint Wenger has declared The Arsenal will play their normal free flowing football no matter what rough house, kick 'em, foul 'em approach the US owned conglomerate Manchester Red Sox Buccaneers take. "How our opponents approach the game is not my responsibility - I'm not speculating about that. We will try to play football, as we always do, and try to bring the trophy home. I am confident that we can achieve it. It will be an exciting game - don't miss it!" Said a very excited Wenger. No doubt Alex 'Ol' 80% Proof Nose' Ferguson will be making some comments this week and once we have translated the dictators comments we will publish them, right here.

The Manchester Red Sox Buccaneers fans are revolting

With all the talk of one of the creatures from Lord of the Rings, trillionaire Malcolm Glazer take over of Manure we decided to keep this story. The fans are revolting and yes it's true and don't we find it funny as hell. The Manchester Red Sox Buccaneers fans are burning effigies and season ticket applications in their contempt of the takeover, which is nice. There is even talk of 'doing a Wimbledon' by creating a breakaway team, aren't those northerners so melodramatic?

Have a laugh and play the game the Malcolm game here.

round-up in 60 seconds or less..

Mamadou Niang who is 'alleged' be tracked by The Arsenal has stressed he is happy to stay at Strasbourg for another season... Bobby Pires who is still 'allegedly' not liking the fact The Arsenal are not willing to offer him a longer contract is considering a move to the footballing mecca of Portugal... Saint Wenger confirms contract talks will go on with Ashley "The best left back in the world™" Cole even though the enquiry into the tapping up affair gets cracking on Wednesday... that's it Keep it locked, more news at 11.