Murder, rape and cash, more drama than 'The Arsenal stadium mystery'

At this time of year, most of the football action is to do with a flurry of activity in the transfer market. However, all the big stories involving The Arsenal players and ex-players would make for a Hollywood blockbuster. An up and coming starlet held in the pokey for an alleged rape, an ex-player being interrogated for the murder of a business partner and oh another one doesn't want to sign a rolling contract (ok not as bad but we had to add it).

We are of course on about Robin van Persie, Davor Suker and Bobby Pires. Unless you have been stuck in deepest Wales or a cricket fan you will know which x marks which spot.

But those who need reminding, Lord van Persie is currently being held in a Rotterdam nick and could possible be held for a further 14 days should the Dutch police decide the allegations need to be further looked into.

Davor Suker the one season wonder (yeah we wonder why we ever bought him - boom boom) was questioned by Croatian Police over the murder of former business partner Dino Pokrovac. It is believed the gunned down agent had business dealings with the Croatian underworld, there's a surprise - a shady agent. As far as we know no charges have been brought forward against the former World Cup Golden Boot winner or the reason for the questioning.

and Bobby Pires is still sulking that he isn't being offered the two year contract he wants, after The Arsenal offered him the traditional 'Over 30's peak time rolling one year contract'. At the moment the deal is at a stand still, however the vultures of Barca and Inter are apparently hovering just waiting to pounce should the Pires moniker not be on the bottom of Arsenal headed paper during the summer.

Some Essien news

Lyon star man and newly crowned French Player of the Year Michael Essien wants to play in the Premiership (that's the EPL to all you Yankchester Buccaneer supporters who read allgoonerdup.com) that's according to his agent.

Fabien Piveteau, the players agent is certainly making his money by touting his man about to all and sundry. The Bank of Chelsea have allegedly had a bid for the player turned down by the French champions who insist the only want 'Big money' for their player. So like any good agent Piveteau has said Essien would be interested in only joining the 'big three' and no that doesn't include the Champions League winners.

If Lyon only want 'big money' for their star player (meaning inflated price) that only really leaves The Bank of Chelsea in the running, who have that Russian blank cheque book they can call on.

Wolves at Ali-Ali-Der's door

Apparently northern monkeys Wolverhampton Wand erers were close to signing the French starlet Jeremie Ali-Ali-Der on a season long deal, however with Lord van Persie possibly being in a spot of bother the deal is on hold.

Wolves manager Glenda Hoddle is proving to be a bit of a Gooner in disguise as he is also trying to get hold of Justin Hoyte on loan, he has already tagged and bagged former Arsenal youngster Rohan Ricketts for the midland s club.

Every 'keeper and his dogg linked to The Arsenal

We should actually make a list or table of which keepers The Arsenal are reportedly interested in as it increases and gets more 'interesting' or is that annoying every day.

Today's 'keepers and none which would have you thinking 'Yep, sign him up' are revealed as, Jose Reina (ok we've heard of him) who plays for Villareal and wanted by Liverpool, Jan Lastuvka who plays for Shakhtar Donetsk and Rennes stopper and reas Isaksson. Reports Saint Wenger actually giving Stuart Taylor a go between the sticks are 'reportedly' well wide of the mark, who will certainly leave should The Arsenal sign a (decent) keeper, hopefully he will take Manuel Almunia with him when and if he does head through the revolving Arsenal goal keeping door.

Allgoonerdup.com awards coming soon...

As it's officially the cricket season, unless you are holding onto the football season for dear life by watching the Women's European Championships(!). Allgoonerdup.com is here to make the non-football season or summer as some people call it a bit more painless and more fun by having the Allgoonerdup.com Awards. So watch this space as the awards will be on the website in two weeks.

You can email the site too if you have your own idea for a particular award.

round-up in 60 seconds or less..

Turkish international and Inter midfielder Emre who stand s 5 foot fook all (so that will help at set pieces) is reportedly a target for five Premiership clubs, with The Arsenal 'allegedly' being one of them... Gilberto 'the invisible wall' will feature in the 'There's no cups so Fifa will just make one up' aka The Confederations Cup in the summer, meaning he will get about as much summer holiday as the boys from Yankchester Buccaneers...  The Arsenal somehow were fourth in the money table for filthy lucre earned during the Champions League campaign... that's it, Keep it locked, more news at 11.